Christmas time is synonymous with joy. I remember Christmas time at home when we were younger: waking up to soft music played by our diligent neighbour, going to church even on week days to practice special songs for Christmas day,pitching up tents in our backyard where all the neighbourhood kids converged to play, sing, eat, laugh and share, gathering dried sticks and old tyres for our camp fire,organizing special stage presentations for our parents, planning pre-Christmas parties, singing carols… the list runs on. Everything about Christmas was fun, happiness brimmed to the full.
Those were the first impressions I had about Christmas. But with passing years and changing circumstances I have come to look at it through different eyes.
I remember vividly that Christmas day when we, all dressed up for church, hurried out of the front gate only to meet with a funeral procession coming from the opposite direction. It was of an infant, we were told. Being cheerful after seeing that seemed the most hypocritical thing to do. The excitement was replaced by a solemnest I couldn't comprehend.
Years later, a neighbour of ours passed away just when the Christmas spirit was warming up. It was a rainy and chilly day; I just had the most wonderful Christmas party at school: we had sung, prayed, shared and ate together; life couldn't have been better! But on reaching home I got the sad news and the colour of my world changed in an instant. I felt like I could really feel the cold for the first time – inside and outside me. I couldn't stay still knowing someone's world has been shattered.
I paid a visit and being there made me realize how thin the line is between life and death, joy and sorrow. I found it hard to believe he won't wake up anymore, death was real, and so was the sorrow. That Christmas was spent with a fresh grave just nearby our home.
People were quick to get back into the festive mood. In fact, much to my astonishment I heard laughter from the deceased's home the night following the funeral! The next day things were“normal” again, everybody was back to their own business. I saw new stuffs being bought and prepared for the winter and heard hearty exchanges among the neighbours as if nothing had happened! What should I call it? Apathy? Coping? Triumph of joy over sorrow?
This leads me to think: what should be our attitude, our reaction in case tragedy strikes during the most joyous season of the year? “Must” we be optimistic and join in the celebrations because such things normally happen or should we feel punished and damned because God chose a time such as this to allow it? Do we lose the right to celebrate? Or is weeping out of the context because 'joy has come'?
It may sound naive and faithless but I believe such questions do creep up when we face such situations. A friend of mine told me of a lonely Christmas she spent at home sick and how she had looked out time and again, through her gate into the pavement in anticipation for someone, anyone to come along. But the neighbourhood wore a deserted look; everyone was away for the festivities. She couldn't help but feel God had excluded her from His birthday party. She couldn't imagine Him staying with her – spending His birthday with a sick girl!
For some, Christmas time just worsens their pain. Memories of a loved one who has passed away, heartaches due to broken relationships, being away from the company of loved ones due to unavoidable
circumstances, etc. Christmas season has a way of making the lonely feel lonelier, the poor feel poorer, the hurting more hurt. Somehow it pinches the soul and reminds us of what we lack – materially, relationally and
perhaps spiritually too.
We believe our Lord was born in Bethlehem that starry night. He was the long awaited child. The
angelic choir sang in celebration, His star lit up the sky, wise men from afar travelled to offer Him gifts and worship Him, and the poor shepherds heard the grand announcement that the Saviour had come! Such splendour! Such joy! Heaven was in celebration!
I am certain that God empathizes with me when I am weeping, He might even weep with me. But is my weeping out of place when He is celebrating? Does being faithful and trusting Him requires I join in His joy? Will He just wipe my tears away and ask me to share in the fun or will He address my pain? I believe not.
The dear Book clearly says the Lord is close to the broken hearted. Jesus even went to the extent of saying, “Blessed are those who mourn for they shall be comforted.” The way I understand it, comforting takes more than making the sad laugh, or throwing a party to forget the pain. To think God works in a quick fix way is to miss out on the real meaning of Christmas.
When God made His entry into history, He was entering into our stories too and that involves joy, happiness, tragedies, heartaches, and everything else imaginable, and everything we go through. Our pain is not hidden from Him, He came to heal us, dress our wounds. He came to pay us attention. Looking back, I can testify that sorrow and pain drew me closer to Him than happiness and prosperity did. It came about when I didn't hide these ugly things from Him. The pains led me to a deeper knowledge of His love and unfailing faithfulness. Now I know why there were such celebrations that night Jesus was born.
So is sadness, tragedies, etc. inappropriate during Christmas time? No. Cry if you must, just don't cry alone,
give your pain to the Saviour. He cares and that's why He came. And if we know this, I believe we'll do our little bit for the grieving and the hurting around us by at the least respecting them. Then no little girl would feel left out from God's grand birthday party.
Those were the first impressions I had about Christmas. But with passing years and changing circumstances I have come to look at it through different eyes.
I remember vividly that Christmas day when we, all dressed up for church, hurried out of the front gate only to meet with a funeral procession coming from the opposite direction. It was of an infant, we were told. Being cheerful after seeing that seemed the most hypocritical thing to do. The excitement was replaced by a solemnest I couldn't comprehend.
Years later, a neighbour of ours passed away just when the Christmas spirit was warming up. It was a rainy and chilly day; I just had the most wonderful Christmas party at school: we had sung, prayed, shared and ate together; life couldn't have been better! But on reaching home I got the sad news and the colour of my world changed in an instant. I felt like I could really feel the cold for the first time – inside and outside me. I couldn't stay still knowing someone's world has been shattered.
I paid a visit and being there made me realize how thin the line is between life and death, joy and sorrow. I found it hard to believe he won't wake up anymore, death was real, and so was the sorrow. That Christmas was spent with a fresh grave just nearby our home.
People were quick to get back into the festive mood. In fact, much to my astonishment I heard laughter from the deceased's home the night following the funeral! The next day things were“normal” again, everybody was back to their own business. I saw new stuffs being bought and prepared for the winter and heard hearty exchanges among the neighbours as if nothing had happened! What should I call it? Apathy? Coping? Triumph of joy over sorrow?
This leads me to think: what should be our attitude, our reaction in case tragedy strikes during the most joyous season of the year? “Must” we be optimistic and join in the celebrations because such things normally happen or should we feel punished and damned because God chose a time such as this to allow it? Do we lose the right to celebrate? Or is weeping out of the context because 'joy has come'?
It may sound naive and faithless but I believe such questions do creep up when we face such situations. A friend of mine told me of a lonely Christmas she spent at home sick and how she had looked out time and again, through her gate into the pavement in anticipation for someone, anyone to come along. But the neighbourhood wore a deserted look; everyone was away for the festivities. She couldn't help but feel God had excluded her from His birthday party. She couldn't imagine Him staying with her – spending His birthday with a sick girl!
For some, Christmas time just worsens their pain. Memories of a loved one who has passed away, heartaches due to broken relationships, being away from the company of loved ones due to unavoidable
circumstances, etc. Christmas season has a way of making the lonely feel lonelier, the poor feel poorer, the hurting more hurt. Somehow it pinches the soul and reminds us of what we lack – materially, relationally and
perhaps spiritually too.
We believe our Lord was born in Bethlehem that starry night. He was the long awaited child. The
angelic choir sang in celebration, His star lit up the sky, wise men from afar travelled to offer Him gifts and worship Him, and the poor shepherds heard the grand announcement that the Saviour had come! Such splendour! Such joy! Heaven was in celebration!
I am certain that God empathizes with me when I am weeping, He might even weep with me. But is my weeping out of place when He is celebrating? Does being faithful and trusting Him requires I join in His joy? Will He just wipe my tears away and ask me to share in the fun or will He address my pain? I believe not.
The dear Book clearly says the Lord is close to the broken hearted. Jesus even went to the extent of saying, “Blessed are those who mourn for they shall be comforted.” The way I understand it, comforting takes more than making the sad laugh, or throwing a party to forget the pain. To think God works in a quick fix way is to miss out on the real meaning of Christmas.
When God made His entry into history, He was entering into our stories too and that involves joy, happiness, tragedies, heartaches, and everything else imaginable, and everything we go through. Our pain is not hidden from Him, He came to heal us, dress our wounds. He came to pay us attention. Looking back, I can testify that sorrow and pain drew me closer to Him than happiness and prosperity did. It came about when I didn't hide these ugly things from Him. The pains led me to a deeper knowledge of His love and unfailing faithfulness. Now I know why there were such celebrations that night Jesus was born.
So is sadness, tragedies, etc. inappropriate during Christmas time? No. Cry if you must, just don't cry alone,
